Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links, which means I earn a commission at no expense to you. Affiliate links are marked with the asterisks (*)
Restarting your business after a divorce or separation is tricky, but not impossible. Here are the initial steps to restart your business whether you left your partner or they left you.
The last few months have been hard for me. However, if you look back over my blog (and if you see my blogging elsewhere) you’ll know that I haven’t been consistent for a while. My lack of consistency has been linked to everything going on recently.
So, as soon as the separation was decided, I realized it was time to stop feeling sorry for myself. It was time to make some changes, and that meant I had to restart my business. Well, I had to put the focus back onto my business.
Trying to restart your business after separating from your partner or spouse isn’t all that easy. There are a lot of emotions right now, and I can tell you that the first month is a whirlwind. You need to work through the emotions and deal with the lack of energy you may have while you try to restart your business.
Allow yourself time to feel those emotions
There are a lot of emotions when it comes to separation. Even if it was your choice, you will start to feel some doubt sinking in.
If you didn’t choose to separate, you’ll be going through the other emotions. There’s the fear, the pain, the anger, and much more. It’s okay to feel all of those emotions.
In fact, you should feel the emotions. Allow yourself to let out the anger (in safe ways), and let yourself cry it all out. Feel the fear and acknowledge that fear. The more you allow yourself to feel the emotions, the easier it is to work through them.
You’ll also want to consider therapy. My marriage therapist became my individual therapist, and it has been the best decision I’ve ever made. I worked through the emotions I felt, especially when it came to the anger and the questions over all my ex’s gaslighting and emotional abuse.
So, work through the emotions. It’s the first thing you need to do for your own health and to help you restart your business.
Get your plan together to restart your business
Now you need to get a plan in order. You’ll have likely put together a business plan when you first started out. Now you need to revisit that plan. You should revisit regularly anyway, but you definitely want to revisit at this point.
You’re not starting from scratch at this point. You have some Google ranking for your blog, and you may still have some email subscribers. The problem is you’ve lost some trust from your readers or your customers (depending on your type of business), and you’ll need to get some of that back.
Now it’s all about how you start that plan.
Don’t plan too much at first
When you’re planning, start slow. Don’t put too much in your diary right away.
When you initially start the plan, you may have a bit of renewed energy. You want to get everything done. Now is the chance to take back some control, right?
However, the emotions will come, and sometimes, they come when you least expect them. The worst thing to do is plan so much that you’ll end up failing at your new plan. This will end up with you losing motivation to keep going with the plan. You’re setting yourself up to fail.
So, instead of planning everything right away, start off small. I started with a few tasks that had to be done on each day of the first week after my separation. Then the next week, I increased the amount that I did. I’m not getting back to what I used to do long before COVID hit and everything changed as I realized what my ex really was.
Plan some time for yourself and your friends
Don’t forget that you need time for yourself. When you were with your spouse, you likely spent a lot of free time with them. Even if you didn’t really like them, you spent time with them.
Now it’s tempting to fill the time with work or with your kids or with something else already in your life. You end up filling up the time with something that you don’t really need. What you need is time with your friends and yourself.
Spend some time meeting up with friends for dinner. You may have pushed away some local friends due to your relationship, or maybe you just need to find some new friends on something like Bumble. Make time to look after yourself and have fun.
Separation can feel isolating and lonely. There are a lot of other people out there going through the same thing. If you surround yourself with work, you’re not going to find them, and it’s not going to be easy to move forward. This will make it difficult to restart your business.
Make time for yourself.
Figure out what’s working for you
Just because you have a plan to restart your business doesn’t mean you have to stick with it. It doesn’t mean it’s going to be right for you. There’s nothing wrong with reassessing the plan and figuring something new out.
You don’t have to scrap the whole plan! You can see which parts of the plan are working and the parts that need a little bit more work.
For me, the plan during the working day was working great. Then I’d get to the evening and the plan that I had there wasn’t working at all. I had to rework a few things. This doesn’t mean failure. It just means you’re growing and learning. The failure is just giving up.
What are you struggling with to restart your business? Share in the comments below.
Sign up for my email newsletter for more tips on being a successful work at home mom.