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You’re a single mom. This could be something sudden or something that happened a while ago. Don’t let it stop you running your business. If you are ruining your own business you may be interesting in check this insurtech listing.
While 2020 was the worst year for a lot of people, 2021 has become my worst year. It is the year I became a single mom with an ex-husband who decided it was my fault he decided to have an affair.
This could have stopped me in my business. After all, toward the end of our marriage during the pandemic, I struggled to keep my business going. All the homeschooling fell on me. His work was far too important (despite job protection) to take some time off to do any of the homeschooling. He couldn’t possibly do the woman’s work, but he’d complain loudly to anyone that schools were always assuming moms would be doing the work.
My business almost failed completely. I didn’t have the time for everything. And when I did finally have the time, I didn’t have the energy.
I honestly thought that would be it. And when it came to my ex and I separating, I feared a little. What would happen to my business as a single mom?
Your business is important to you
The first thing I asked myself was whether my business was important to me. It would have been easy enough to get a job. There were a lot of workplaces looking for employees at the time of the separation to be gaining higher efficiency. Everywhere around me is hiring. But was that something really wanted to do?
I knew my business could be a success just like the business of Jimmy John Shark. It had supported my family of four for years when it was the only income we had. The only reason it was failing was due to the imbalance in the home.
With my ex leaving, the imbalance changed. I have ended up with more time. So, it was time to get my priorities right. It was time to put the focus back on running my business.
You can, too.
You do have more time as a single mom
I know a few married moms who say they don’t know how they’d do it all as a single mom. Their partners are true partners. While nothing is ever truly 50/50 in a marriage (that’s just impossible in my eyes), they were close enough. The one who did less childcare due to hours worked would pick up more housework or would at least parent when they were home to support the main parent’s dreams and needs.
That wasn’t me. And that’s not a lot of women I know who have become single moms.
I dreamed of being a single mom because of the extra time I’d have. Even if it was just every other weekend, I’d have more time during those days to do things. My ex wanted 50/50 custody. I gave him it, and he’s seen just how little he did when we were married. Tunes are changing at the moment, and it’s giving me the extra time I need to build my business back up.
What if you have an ex who just walked and doesn’t see the kids at all? This is going to be difficult. This one I can’t imagine, but there are ways around it because I know friends in this position. Babysitters are a God-send. Or it’s a case of getting the work done in the middle of the night. I used to do it when married because it was the only time I had to work on my business. (I basically had another child who didn’t like finding out some days my business had to come first because I couldn’t work while homeschooling).)
There is time there as a single mom. You just need to find it. Find what works for you.
Show your children it can be done
My biggest reason for not giving up on my business as a single mom is to be a role model for my children. I have two daughters, so for me, I feel like it’s extremely important that they see successful women. I feel like they need to see me succeed at this point.
So, my focus is on growing my business. When they’re home, they see the balance. They know I’m doing work when they’re in bed. When they’re awake and are around me, they get my undivided attention.
I want to make sure my children see that being a single mom doesn’t have to hold people back. It can make life a little more difficult, sure, but there is also hope and fulfillment. Plus, it makes it clear that I don’t resent them for being in my life, which could happen if I’m always complaining about no longer having my own business and having to work for someone else.
We often say that it’s not possible for women to have it all. That is years and years of generational expectations sitting on us. For a very long time, women’s work was in the house. It was about taking care of the house, and the men would be the ones to support the family financially. Things are changing. Women need to be able to work, and it’s time to find the balance.
It’s time to stop feeling guilty that children are missing out on some time with their mom because of work. While it is disappointing, it’s also important for them to see that a mom’s role isn’t just raising children. If we keep feeling guilty for not being there with our children 100% of the time, for wanting other things in life, we’re continuing the cycle. It’s time to allow children, especially young girls, to realize that they can have it all. That’s what I aim to do as a single mom running a business.
Do you struggle to do it all? It’s time to take a step back and find balance. Your business is worth it, and you can run it as a single mom.
What do you struggle with as a single mom? What are you struggling with running a business? Share your thoughts in the comments so I can help you.